


hollow-bodied harmonies

by TechnicalTragedy



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Fights, Forgiveness, M/M, Trust
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-24
Updated: 2016-07-24
Packaged: 2018-07-26 10:34:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 879
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7570846
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TechnicalTragedy/pseuds/TechnicalTragedy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>that's the thing about family, isn't it?</p>
            </blockquote>





	hollow-bodied harmonies

**Author's Note:**

> idk it's like 6 am and i just had random inspiration so here's a quick short thing i wrote.

what they are isn't kind.

vax lashes out. percy retaliates. they poison each other with words every time they open their mouths.

maybe once they were kind.

there is no space for it, not between the arguments and ignorance, not in the scant atoms between them when vax's punch lands on percy's jaw.

"hit me, you motherfucker," vax says, demands.

percy swallows, can't look vax in the eye. "no."

so vax punches him again and percy takes it, keeps turning back after each successive hit like he wants it. "fucking fight back!" vax says, so angry at percy because he doesn't even have the decency to beat the shit out of vax.

"i don't want to fight you," percy says.

vax does all the fighting for him, landing blow after blow. it doesn't make him feel better. if anything, it makes him feel worse, because blood drops off percy and bruises decorate his face but he returns, lets vax hit him again and again.

percy's blood is spattered on the floor, his hands are shaking at his sides, but he looks at vax with complete trust. and this is a lamb vax can't bring himself to slaughter.

he puts his hand to percy's cheek, concentrates on that swirling power inside him and channels it into percy. it isn't an instant fix, but he's less bruised, less bloodied.

"i'm sorry," vax says.

percy shrugs. "you needed it."

"i won't hit you again," vax promises. he still has percy's blood on his hands, drying on his knuckles.

"i don't know that either of us believe that," percy says. it isn't venomous, just factual. he wipes his nose on his sleeve, leaving a crimson streak on the white fabric.

vax swallows. "you've fucked up a lot, percival."

percy snorts derisively. "i am fully aware of that."

"i've fucked up a lot, too," vax continues.

"not as much as i have, i can almost guarantee."

vax frowns. "you make it very hard to apologize, you realize that?"

"that was supposed to be an apology?" percy says. "you've already said you're sorry, i don't see what else you could say."

they stand at an impasse. two immovable objects, two unstoppable forces.

vax looks away first, trying to escape the sight of percy's banged-up face. "i don't hate you. just so you know."

"okay," percy says.

"i should," vax says, "i want to, i wish i could, but. i can't. and it makes everything better and a whole lot worse at the same time."

percy nods. "that's the thing about family, isn't it?"

the castle is quiet. vox machina are asleep in their beds. percy looks at vax and vax feels like percy sees right through him, to all the dark and all the light and all the bones and soul of him.

"come with me," percy says.

he takes vax's hand in his own and leads them up winding staircases, ignoring every question from vax. percy opens a trapdoor at the top of a tower and they step out onto the highest point of the castle. the grounds stretch out before them, the city visible in the distance, the thick forest over the land like a blanket.

"do you trust me?" percy asks.

vax thinks of gilmore pushing him off the cliff, and the rakshasa leading him up staircases, and vex cold and still on the floor and the anger at knowing percy caused it, and of their late night fireside chat, and of percy's giddiness upon finding cassandra. he thinks back to before whitestone, when percy had trusted vox machina enough to reveal the briarwoods' foul deeds, to when he'd looked percy in the eyes and said "i trust you implicitly."

"of course," vax answers.

percy smiles. "then that will have to be enough."

vax doesn't have anything to say to that, not for a long while. by the time he's ready to reply percy is yawning, jaw cracking with each one. "hey," vax says.

"hm?" percy turns his attention to vax, eyes bleary behind his glasses. vax finds he isn't sure when percy had put them back on.

"do you think trust will actually be enough?" vax asks.

percy shrugs, swinging his feet in open air. he looks like he could fly, perched so close to the edge of the crenellation as he takes in the sight of his city. "i suppose only time will tell."

vax doesn't know if they have time, if time would even wait for them. he looks at percy and sees a man trying to repent for his sins before he even considers forgiving himself for them. he looks at himself and sees a broken boy who's found religion only to be consumed by it. they're burning themselves up. they've both been too busy breaking their own hearts for as long as they've been beating to find something that might help them heal rather than hurt.

the road unspools before them, a long string leading off into an indefinite forever.

vax threads his fingers through percy's, his bruised knuckles with percy's gunpowdered hands. "with time, then."

percy looks at him, and vax looks back. it isn't quite understanding, but it's something kindred; it isn't quite trust, but it's getting there.

and that will have to be enough.


End file.
